“It takes true courage to be a dove, but no honor accrues to being an ostrich”


2.0's two month check up was this morning. She turns nine weeks today and it seems like she was JUST born! She is growing like a bean stalk and will soon be a giant. She is already 24" long and she weighs almost 14lbs. When the nurse asked if I had any concerns about her eating habits I asked if she needed a diet.

When the doctor came in we went over all of my questions about 2.0 and then I asked one about Bug. I've been through a deployment alone, never with kids. Especially, not such a super daddy's girl. So, I asked the Doctor about how best to prepare Bug for J leaving. She told me to tell her that he's going to work and that we'll see him {{on Skype}} and talk to him when we can. Then she said, "The best way to prepare her, is to make sure your prepared. Are you ready?" To which I instantly *burst* into tears.

Are you kidding me? Am I ready? For my husband to go replace a unit that has lost 56 soldiers in the last 12 months? In a country fighting a war that most of America has forgotten about? Hmmm.... Nope. Actually, I've been blissfully ignoring all those things hoping that the heavens would open, something miraculous would happen, and I wouldn't have to deal with it. An ostrich, with it's head in the sand. I've been doing good too. I made it through all the deployment questions from family over Thanksgiving. Managed to squeak through Christmas without being an emotional wreck and even managed to have a happy & hopeful New Years. But I can't do it anymore. It's time to pull my head out of the sand and face reality. He's going. And it sucks.

After a minute I had composed myself enough to make jokes when she asked if I had lots of friends and family close. Then she told me that she would be my friend and suggested I drop the kids off at daycare, go pick her up and we could have a beach day {{hahaha! that's even more absurd now than it was in the office}}.

I cried all the way home. My husband is REALLY deploying....

and it REALLY sucks.

Slap Boxing Tony Horton

I'm getting old. Do you know how I know? I am only on day 6 of this beach body endeavor and my limbs want to fall off. Not only that, I have been popping OTC pain relievers like an 80 year old.

Day 6 of P90X had me doing Kenpo X. Day 5 was Legs & Back. After the legs and back video I thought it would be an AWESOME idea to stuff my wobbly legs into some super cute 4" boots and go walk around the mall for awhile. Terrible idea!

Other than the expected soreness {{ouch!}} I am really enjoying the program and am excited to be almost one week down. There is only one serious issue I am having with P90X and that is coordination....

Namely, I don't have any. I fall walking up stairs, trip over my own feet, and I have awful depth perception, so I am constantly running into things that don't move. Seriously, I walk into at least three different walls in the house on a daily basis. They've always been there. They never move. And still, I smack right into them.

So when I am instructed to do whatever the hell this is....

I start to fear for my life. Think it looks simple? Get into runners pose, then straighten your upper body out, reaching you arms and hands straight up to the ceiling. If you've made it this far without falling over, congrats, you're already doing better than me. Then bring your hands down into Namaste {{prayer}} pose, twist at the waist, bending forward and place your elbow on the OUTSIDE of your font leg. Then stay that way and breeeeeaaaaaaathe. Oh, and try not to smash your face into your elbow, the ground, couch, or whatever else is close by {{not that I did or anything}}. If I were to film myself and put it on youtube, I would go viral...

So, Today was Kenpo X. The majority of the video {{actually all of it}} is punching and kicking. It's loads of fun {{soooooo 'fun'}}. My favorite moment of the workout today was some crazy combo move: Jab, Cross, Hook, Uppercut. At first I am doing very well. Then he speeds up and I wonder if I'm doing the move right or if I've started the chicken dance. Then he speeds up a little bit more. {{Excellent.}} I am slap boxing Tony Horton... He says, "It doesn't have to be pretty..."

Don't worry, Tony. It's not.

Culinary Curiosity

As you know, it has become a mission of mine to get out of the mealtime rut I got us into. In October {{I think}} I started finding new recipes and meal planning. We've had fun trying new foods that I've found, that friends have shared and in cookbooks and online. I've even shared one here. Culinary Curiosity will be one of the new feature posts about our adventures trying new food - the good, bad & ugly.

Last night, I made a Pork Apple Bake - a P90X recipe. I understand the whole savory-food thing with the salt and the sweet, but honestly, the idea of apples on my pork didn't really sound like a good idea. The recipe itself is pretty simple: Layer lean boneless pork, thinly sliced sweet potatoes and thinly sliced apples. Bake at 350* until cooked. Salt & pepper if desired {{it is desired so I used sea salt & fresh cracked pepper}}. I also drizzled some olive oil over the top of the dish because it seemed a little dry when it went into the oven. And actually when it went in, it looked fairly appetizing and I was excited to be opening new food doors.

However, when it came out of the oven, any appealing look the food had, had been cooked off by the heat of the stove {{Womp, womp}}. I am always impressed by the amazing timing J has. Usually he comes home only to catch me watching embarrassing tv {{like the Kardashians *red face*}} or something else equally mortifying. Last night he walked in right as I was closing the door on the stove to let the food cook longer. My face must have said it all because he asked what was wrong. That's the deal with new recipes you just find; you never know what your going to get or how it will taste.

So, after some fair warning and a few more minutes in the oven we sat down to eat... this.

Believe it or not it didn't taste as bad as it looked. My biggest problem with the dish was the apples {{I used Granny Smiths trying to even out the sweet}} and the sweet potatoes cooked down quite a bit and by the time they were plated {{ok someone's been watching too much Chopped}} it was like eating mashed apple-sweet potatoes. Not bad... just interesting...?

Needless to say that recipe probably wont be made anytime soon again in this house. I think it was an ugly, fail.

Speaking of P90X - It's Stablatic!

I had breakfast with Tony Horton again today. Well, I had breakfast with him but he didn't have breakfast with me. Today was day 2 of the Lean P90X program. I chose to do the Lean program because it is more cardio based than the Classic & Doubles. It went much better than day 1 but that's only because the kids were asleep {{its pretty hard to do lunges with a 2year old circling through your legs}}. He's an interesting guy. He's full of wonderful words of wisdom and retarded jokes {{like "Stablatic"}} that he laughs at all by himself...

Maybe Day 3 will be with no talking.

Changes

Today is J's birthday. We get to celebrate by seeing a movie. In the theater. Like people who don't have children get to. I can't even remember the last movie we saw in the theater and I think we had Bug with us that trip. So our little movie date tonight will be a nice change {{thanks to our neighbor who will be keeping the girls!}}.

J goes back to work tomorrow. He has been off work on block leave {{should be called blech leave because it is bittersweet}} since the middle of December. With him going back to work things will undoubtedly be getting busier for him up until he leaves and I'm expecting the next few weeks to fly by. I'm still doing my best to ignore the changes that February will bring.

Other changes here in our house are baby changes. 2.0 is growing like a little weed. She is already wearing some of her 3-6month clothing and quite a few of her 3mos outfits are pulling at her shoulders. Not that impressive until I remind you the kid is only 8 weeks old. She's going to be our tall, serious, mommy's girl. I can't wait for her to start smiling at us!

We don't just have changes going on in our house, I also have some changes planned for the blog that I'm really excited about. There are some new feature posts that I am looking forward too doing and hoping to start them by the end of the month. Since I'm hoping one of the things changing around here will be my waistline, one of the feature posts will include a monthly fashion-related post, which will be an homage to being one HOT MAMA on a PBR budget {{it CAN be done and I'll prove it!!}}. Also, a monthly "New Shoe Day" post and hopefully a monthly fun craft post as well... Exciting things!!

I'd also like there to be visual changes here. I'm working on this but I'm not quite sure where to begin. I'd rather not pay someone to make my blog if I can avoid it. Google has been very helpful in the past for blogger backgrounds and I'm hoping I can figure out how to create my own page, signature, title box {{for some reason every time I've tried, they've always been off centered}} and a grab-button. I have created some pages to add to my blog and I even added myself to the MilSpouse Blogger list, though for some reason the button appears to be broken.

Any blog creation tips or advice? I'd love to hear it!

2012

I don't make New Years Resolutions. I don't think I ever have. Resolutions are made and then forgotten about, usually, before the end of January. There are some things I want to accomplish this year so instead of calling them resolutions I'm going to call them goals. I'm also going to break them down throughout the months. Making them short term will mean they'll likely get reached instead of being forgotten about. Also, I'm limiting each month's goals to 10 to keep from feeling overwhelmed and at the end of each month I will do a post updating on my goals.

January 2012's Goals

1.) Blog more. Won't be that hard to accomplish this one, I don't think I posted at all in December.

2.) Potty train Bug. She is not even a little bit interested in "The Big Girl Potty". Any ideas? We had her in training pants & big girl-tinker bell undies last week and we'd sit her on the potty for 5-10 minutes only to have her get up and pee a couple of minutes later.

3.) Lose 8-10 pounds. I have GOT to get rid of this baby weight. I have been using myfitnessplanner.com for about two weeks now. Tracking my calories and activity level has been fun and its a free website that is similar to using WW. I have lost 3 pounds but I have a LONG ways to go before I'm where I want to be.

4.)Days 1-30 of P90X. It will help me accomplish goal #3.

5.) Write a business plan for SBE. I haven't done a darn thing for SB's since I had 2.0 and I feel like I've lost motivation to make the business happen. I had a pretty hard blow from a potential customer at the end of November. He called asked if I could do something custom for a cigar box he was making ((that would have been FRICKIN SWEET)) and when I gave him the price quote he gave me the old, "Let me talk to my wife..." and I haven't heard from him since. Jerk. Anyways, I let the fact that someone found no value in what I do get to me and between that and not being on the ball for Christmas last year ((hehe)) I am just feeling behind.

6.) Clean my office. It looks like a two year old has gone in there and thrown paperwork, boxes, supplies and stacks of bills everywhere. It's weird. Definitely not helping the business rut I feel in.

7.) Go on a few dates with my husband. J will be deploying soon and it would be nice to have some Us-time before he goes. I made an agreement with one of my awesome neighbors where I will babysit for them and she'll babysit for us. So hopefully we can take advantage of that and get some good date time in before her leaves.

8.) Take more pictures of the girls. Time is zooming by WAAAYYY too fast ((what happened to days that used to drag?)) & I want to remember everything.

9.) Start planning a wine-tasting party for the end of Feb. I've never had one and having it at the end of February will combine two of my favorite things ((wine & friends)) at a time when I will likely need the both of them the most.

10.) Paint the living room. While J has been on block leave we got the kitchen decorating done with a new backsplash & paint color. Bug helped us out in the decorating department by finding an orange crayon somewhere and adding a large piece of artwork to a wall in the living room ((isn't she helpful?)) I will pick a room a month to finish while J is gone. The LR would have been the first on my list but I guess there is no harm in starting a month early.

Alright, let's see how this goes.

New Shoe Day

For as long as I can remember, I've loved shoes. Picking them out, thinking about the clothes they'd go with, the fantastic times I'd have wearing them. I LOVE shoes. Not just affordable ones either. Christian Louboutin's? Yes, please! Jimmy Choo? I do! Do I care that they are a thousand dollars a pair {{give or take a few hundred dollars}}? No I don't {{because I'm too cheap to buy them, but if I wasn't I would own a room full!}}

There was a time in my life when it was nothing for me to wear 4 or 5 inch heels all day long, every day. I even put heels on once to go put gas in my car {{They make you feel sexy & look skinnier. What girl doesn't want that?}} But my life has come a long way from that and now I'm lucky to get a shower and put make up on in the morning. I've lost a lot of that Me. Not that I mind growoing up and not basing my purchases around which club I'd be wearing what to. It's just that if that me, met this me on the street, she'd be a little lot surprised. But I still like to throw in a sexy shoe every now and then to mix it up a bit.

In February I joined justfab.com to buy an AWESOME pair of shoes for the military ball we were attending. I wore a black dress and since it was black I thought I'd throw in some color {{and awesomeness}} with my shoes.

Since then, every month I've had the pleasure of what I've deemed "New Shoe Day". They are inexpensive, sexy, high and mostly, really impractical for a mother of two small children. However, once a month I open my front door and for five minutes while I squeal and walk around in them, I am some thing more than Mommy, a maid, and a walking bottle.

She may not get to come out very often but the Megs I used to be is still there, screaming for me to rock some awesome shoes.

This month's pick:

Nursing in Public: An Experiment Gone Humorously Wrong

Last Saturday, the hubs, the kids and I braved the crowds and went shopping at the mall in Raleigh. While there, we picked up a "First Christmas" ornament for 2.0, visited with our jeweler and showed off our new sleepy baby. After we finished shopping, J dropped the three of us off at the play area so he could go buy my Christmas present and so Bug could play for a bit.

I thoroughly believe that kids have a timer that goes off as soon as they are left alone with one parent. Particularly, when there's more than one of them. As soon as J walked out of ear shot, 2.0 woke up and was absolutely 'starving' and she was letting me know it. Bug is a Super-daddy's-girl and when she realized he wans't sitting with me she started the beginnings of the most interesting meltdown she has ever thrown {{she did have an audience}}. Like all parents, I assesed the situation and decided the newborn was higher on the priority list. I managed to change 2.0's diaper while she continued to let me know how angry she was for letting her get so hungry {{I use the term 'starving' with a lot of sarcasm. This kid gained 1lb 10oz in 17 days.}} Mean while, my two year old is crying for her daddy throwing herself on the bench and then on the floor and then back on the bench again. Saying, "oh no!" and covering her mouth in a Scarlett O'Hara-esque display. She was being EXTREMELEY ridiculous. The little old lady down the bench from me apologized for laughing. Not that I blame her. It *was* funny.

After changing her, I decided that I would try nursing 2.0 in the moby. For the first time. Ever. I have had several discussions about this with friends and my neighbor even showed me how easy it was while we were out for a walk. {{Can't be too hard. Apparently, people do it all the time!}} I bust out my moby, trying not to laugh at my 2 year old, who is still in hysterics except for when she sees the slide and stops to go play for a moment {{Oh! Something shiny!}} Not to worry though, when she's finished sliding, she returns to her ridiculousness. At this point I have a very angry newborn in my moby and I'm trying to get my boob out without flashing the play area {{cant you just hear the headline? 'Woman arrested in Raleigh for exposing herslef to kids.'}} By now a creepy old man across the play area from us, realizes what I'm doing and has become VERY Interested in what Im doing {{Ew!}}. By this point in the fiasco I'm getting a little flustered {{Weird, right?}}. My boob is half out of my shirt ((covered with the moby)), my VERY angry newborn is trying to nurse on my shirt and right at *this* moment, my 2 year old decides she's angry at her overalls and shimmies right out of them. Right there, in the middle of the play area.

There comes a moment in every new experience where you either conquer the situation or accept defeat. Watching Bug run around in circles, laughing, without her pants on, the creepy old guy trying to catch a glimpse and the screaming 'starving' newborn in the moby = serious defeat.

Note to self: Try these things at home first.